Everything Bianca

So Many Pies, So Few Fingers

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Robe of Awesome Fucking Power
I want this robe.

I want this robe for probably the same reason many women buy robes. I feel that owning and wearing this robe will enhance my sense of self as a bad assed mother fucker. I feel like this robe comes imbued with special powers of blood lust, charisma, and domination.

I may need to buy a pair of red stilettos to go with this robe. Black lace bra perhaps? If red, then blood red, like a maroon. I don't own a lace anything (okay, there's a lace boyshort somewhere...) but I feel like this is the robe that lace undergarments were made for, and if I were going to wear anything under this robe, lace would fit perfectly. But lets be honest, I'm not wearing anything under this robe.... except for stilettos.

I'm also going to need a glass of bourbon with two cubes of ice in hand whenever I'm in this robe.

And a boy at my feet... preferably on his hands and knees, with a leather collar. No leash, because this boy will be trained. In fact, boy, hold my bourbon. *pats his head* Good boy.

I imagined a robe like this existed yesterday, and look, I found it.

Not going to buy it though (I'm not sure this is a true statement). I may turning into a raving lunatic bitch with delusions of dominatrix like powers.

My wouldn't that be fabulous?

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Okay, for the record *IF* we buy this robe then we *absolutely* have to wear our hair as so:

split into half, two very high ponytails on each side just above the ear. Tie each ponytail off with a matching red ribbon in a bow.

Then twist the hair or braid... which ever has the more demented effect.

Bloody perfect.

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