Everything Bianca

So Many Pies, So Few Fingers

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Writer's Block: I see you
When, if ever, is it okay to snoop on your significant other? Have you ever?

If it feels like snooping then you already have a deeper problem, and whatever you find or don't find won't help.

Joe can walk up to me and browse my phone / computer whenever he wants. I can (and have) done the same. Joe cares slightly more about my interactions, and I don't mind it. I have nothing to hide, not even the male porn my coworker shares with me.

But that's me.

I think, if you don't have the stones to "be nosy" in another's presence, then don't do it at all.

If you feel your SO is hiding something from you / lying / cheating - confront it, don't go all slimy snake P.I.

I've never done it and I never will. If I look through your shit, you'll watch me do it, and I'll do it cuz I'm bored and nosy.

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Back after my ex-wife and I parted company, we remained friends. Sometimes after that, I took in someone we both had previously known who arrived in town with no $$.

When I told my ex of my new temporary room mate via e-mail, she asked me if the gal was a crazy as she used to be. I replied that she was.

The new room mate was permitted to use my computer. I had set up a user account just for her. One day I came home and the room mate was in a real pissy mood. After quizzing her, she blurted out that she had read the exchange between my ex-wife and I and that had pissed her off. She wanted me to feel guilty. I laughed at her and told her she should not have gone snooping where she did not belong.

As to the question of spousal snooping, my lovers were always free to read my personal journal, back before I had the internet, and my posts on LJ are never locked to ex-lovers or close friends. I doubt I will have any new lovers, but if I do, I sure do not think I will ever get secretive with them.

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